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ampersandman

23 karmaJoined Seeking work

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4

Thank you for sharing your insights. 

So my big ambitions mostly hinge on my hope that my health conditions go into remission. I continue to improve after removing the medication I mentioned, and I'm pretty sure I'll eventually get to where I was before it. 

Although where I was before was still not well enough to undertake a full running of a non-profit. Constant generalized anxiety, mild brain fog, moderate social anxiety. As for that, I'm cautiously optimistic that a ketogenic diet or carnivore diet will take me all the way to "normal". I've spent a lot of time searching the web for things like "keto cured my social anxiety" or "keto cured my brain fog" and I've seen a heck of a lot of people say they are pretty much fixed of chronic, treatment-resistant problems, after simply cutting out carbs.

I'm not so confident that "Social anxiety is treatable, even curable" with behavioral treatments for everyone. For me, it feels very tied to my ME/CFS, which is increasingly being accepted to not at all be amenable to psychological treatments. No behavioral change has ever changed my anxiety in the slightest. Not talk therapy, not exposure therapy, not meditation. Whenever the ME is worse, say, during a crash from overexertion, the social anxiety, and generalized anxiety are also worse. 

I'd compare it to someone who is in severe withdrawal from opiates, going through horrible anxiety. Even if maybe some behavioral technique could ease it a little bit, I don't think any practice, or any amount of effort, apart from direct alteration of brain chemicals, such as through drugs, will cure that person's anxiety for the time they are in withdrawal. 

Similar to the plea of the ME/CFS community to the medical community to stop believing it is a psychological disorder that can be treated by CBT, I think my social anxiety and anxiety fit into the same category. Not saying everyone's does, and I'm sure lots of people do get helped. But for me, I think it's more like the guy withdrawing from opiates and unrelated to behavior/thought.

I would not be opposed to trying the programs you offered if I had more energy, but given my very low expectation of them working for me, it's not worth the effort while I'm this fatigued.

Overcome is very cool, and thank you for making that. One thing I would suggest is put specific details on the website. I was searching for where the science behind the program was, and couldn't find anything. I'd recommend adding what the credentials of the people training others in the techniques are, what the exact practices are, and link to research papers showing those practices work. 

But anyway, thank you for your feedback, I'll keep it in mind!

Thank you for those links. I'll look through, but I'm not super hopeful, as I've trialed dozens of medications, all of which have had zero or negative effect. Not even a glimmer of improvement, apart from amphetamine, although that only worked a couple times before tolerance, and is not a practical treatment. 

As for therapy, I've tried a few times, and maybe it would work if I wasn't so dang tired. But the work required for therapy takes a lot of energy I don't have.

And as for ME/CFS, there aren't many effective treatments. There are a few that work in some people, like LDN or antivirals, although I'd have to find a doctor who not only believes it's a real disorder, but is up to date on the latest potential treatments, and those doctors are few and far between.

I'm hopeful in the promise that a ketogenic diet could improve my symptoms. One reason is the ever increasing anecdotal and study data showing large improvements in all sorts of chronic illnesses with the diet. Another reason is that removing carbs feels very similar to the withdrawal I felt from the psychiatric medication, so I think it is possible that it is like drug withdrawal, and I would feel better after some time off of them. Unfortunately, the withdrawal is so bad and lasts so long, I can't just jump right in, so I'm very slowly tapering, just like I did with the medication.

I actually applied for some career advice from them a while ago, and they didn't accept my request. For more details on capabilities, check out the reply I just made to John's comment!

Thanks for the questions!

What is your knowledge level?

I've only completed high school. I completed two out of three quarters of the first year at college before I had to drop out, and have taken two more classes since then. All just basic gen ed classes like English and history. Some bio and chem.

Are there specific areas within the non-profit sector you are particularly interested in?

The two organizations I mentioned above, Center for Reducing Suffering, and Organization for the Prevention of Intense Suffering, have the kind of mission I am interested in. Any kind of organization that researches the most effective ways to prevent the worst kinds of suffering, no matter what form or who is experiencing it. 

Maybe specifically things like research into preventing s-risks, treating extremely painful disorders, wild animal suffering, or finding ways to prevent human-caused cruelty/torture.

Also, I'm interested in the field of empathy, because I think if we can find a way to increase the general empathy of the population, and cause more people to care about the suffering of others, this might be one of the greatest levers for preventing suffering in all its forms. An organization that studies the science of compassion and altruism is Stanford's The Center for Compassion And Altruism Research And Education.

  • How many hours per week are you able to commit to volunteering or part-time work?

All combined, my energy would probably allow for about 20-40 hours. With my CFS still not completely gone, the less I have to be on my feet, the longer I can work.

  • Do you have any previous work or volunteer experience, even if not directly related to non-profits?

Most of my work experience is very much non-related: delivery driver, furniture assembly, mover, rideshare. During my short stint at college, I did have a job helping out at a microbiology lab for a few months - getting petri dishes ready, autoclaving, etc.

I volunteered just a couple times at a homeless shelter passing out food.

  • What are your strengths?

I'm fairly intelligent. At least with the more "objective" subjects like math and science. Those always came really easy to me up through high school, and I once placed first in a regional math tournament in middle school. 

"Subjective" stuff like literature, though - please don't ask me to provide the themes and motifs of a novel.

I've taught myself some coding. I like to try to make things easier or solve problems with computer code. It is hard for me to maintain enough attention and organization to complete any polished software projects, but I've played around with Python a lot.

If an appliance or piece of hardware isn't working, I love to open it up and try to find the component that is causing it, and to see if I can fix it. For example, my brother asked me to fix his office phone, and I had fun opening it up and digging around the inside until I found the loose part that just needed to be soldered back on.

Lately, I've been very interested in machine learning, because it takes "make things easier or solve problems with computer code" to a whole new level, making problems magnitudes easier to solve. I especially see a lot of promise in machine learning being used in various ways to find treatments for health disorders. 

A project I've been working on and am very excited about lately is using machine learning models to search through internet comments, find every instance of someone saying a treatment worked for them, extract the treatment and condition names, then organize it for further study. 

If you would like to read my detailed write up of what I'd like to achieve with that project, I wrote something on Medium.

Although the project seemed super straightforward when I started, I am continually running into complex, discouraging roadblocks in the machine learning/software fields. But I think I'm onto something really big with this idea, and I am honestly amazed that it's not a thing yet. And I feel like if no one else is doing it, I have to, because the cure for my lifelong anxiety might be hidden in a Reddit comment that got buried ten years ago and forgotten.

Another strength is that I'm kind. It almost physically hurts me to see people/animals in pain, and I am very motivated to figure out how to relieve their suffering as quickly as possible. 

I'll throw in some weaknesses: anything social. Teamwork, leadership, presentations. My social anxiety is ever present and very bad. 

Writing essays - Due to brain fog, it is often hard to be creative and think of things to write about.

And of course the ME/CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) in general is a huge weakness and greatly limits my mental and physical stamina in any task. It is very hard for me to gauge how much work I can do, and I often overestimate how much I can do, then have to quit. I am hopeful that it will continue to improve to where I have normal energy, but for now, that is something I have to be very mindful of. 

An example of an ideal scenario in my mind would be: a non-profit hires me for ten hours a week initially, doing super easy work on-site (remote work feels like I'd be missing a large chunk of the learning experience). Tasks like filing papers or making routine calls. I would be in constant communication with the employer, and if and whenever we felt I could take on more work without overexerting myself, I would cautiously take on more and more responsibility and hours, gaining experience and insight all along the way.

  • What are your salary expectations?

I would of course like as much money as possible, but that's mostly because I want to be as secure as possible for retirement. But my lifestyle currently is very frugal. I pinch pennies every chance I can, buying cheap food, driving my paid off Prius as efficiently as possible (while trying to avoid annoying the people behind me!), and I've got low rent as I'm renting a room in my brother's house. Also, not much social life to spend money on, what with the social anxiety.

So while I'd eventually like a position with a higher salary, like at least >$70,000, I think for now I would be fine on $30,000, maybe less, if I thought it was leading somewhere.